I tread a patch of thin ice here. My world–our own distant past with a twist of magic–has no strict, uniform magical system; at least not one that is known to its people. My characters have no superpowers. Unusual abilities, perhaps, but they don’t rival the forces of nature. The gods keep their noses out of things. They are seen in a few muddled dreams and visions. A reader might see these as figments of the characters’ imagination.
However, I take out one of the bad guys with an amazingly coincidental bolt of lightning.
No one (in the story) can explain it satisfactorily. On one hand, my MCs are accused of calling down the fire from the sky by sorcery (a delightfully vague concept). On the other hand, some people insist that the Good Spirits were ticked off at the deceased. The fact that one of the good guys all but had to be carried away doesn’t bother either side.
This ambiguous event is entirely in the realm of everyday possibility. Stand out in the open when a violent summer storm is approaching and…POW. There is a high probability of lightning striking just ahead of a storm; you don’t have to be in a downpour already. No need for threads of stray magic to act as a lightning rod, either, but they were there.
What none of the surviving characters knew at the time is that the thunderstruck man posessed–and was possessed by–an ancient talisman that contained the demented soul of the sorcerer who created it. What’s more, it held power stolen from many others, and an uncertain number of trapped souls collected over thousands of years.
Perhaps the talisman was close to some kind of “critical mass”. At any rate, it hungered for yet one more soul–that of my main MC. Its owner, who had hoped to use it to increase his own power, was thwarted and angry. The escaped sacrifice was tantalizingly close again. A thunderstorm blew down from the ice-capped Tatras to bedevil the Krakow uplands. Was it a logical consequence, or was it a DEM?
What exactly makes a word or phrase “too modern” to be used by a resident of the Pleistocene? Can anyone give me a nice concise accurate dictionary of caveman-speak?
I don’t think so.
I am constantly amazed at how one person after another can pick out dozens of “wrong” words — and no two lists are anything alike. Each reader has a unique set of pet peeves. Most of it is from (IMHO) expectation based on assumptions ingrained by exposure to Hollywood crap. Movie cavemen must talk like cavemen. Pile it on, grind it in. They are dumb savages, right?
Wrong. They are our ancestors, and they were some damn smart cookies. They created works of art that put goosebumps all over modern viewers. They were human beings who concerned themselves with food, hunting, survival, what the neighbors were up to, and why the stars stuck to the sky. They had rich, complex language that we can only guess at from root words that survived in many modern tongues.
So, why is it wrong to interpret their (fictitious) thoughts in words that come as close as possible to what they intend to say?
Every word that I use to write is modern English. Where do I draw the line? And then there’s the other side of the coin. My vocabulary is large and eclectic. It isn’t limited to what some people hear on TV. Is it all right to use a word that Shakespeare liked?
Just gimme a clue.
Sometimes I have wondered if the story wasn’t taking on a YA tone, and thought maybe that was the way I should go. But my intent is to appeal to a wide age spectrum. I never set out to write YA. My MC is in his teens because that is when a pivotal series of events changes his life. Among his people, anyone his age is considered an adult. He is undersocialized, however; a paradoxical mixture of someone who is both mature and young for his age.
Why should the age of the MC matter? When I was young, I liked to read about adults, not stupid kids. I read heavy stuff, I wanted to explore. Now I’m an old foguette and I like lighter reading. Harlequin Romances aren’t labeled YA because they spare the brain cells.
What set me off is that someone somewhere said my query sounds YA — and mostly useless. What can I say? I try to get the MC’s voice into it, and get slapped down for oversharing. Wottever. I’m done with posting any kind of WIP anywhere for now.
Meanwhile, I have come to doubt my genre. That’s a shitty feeling. I don’t like being labeled. Should I knuckle under if someone points out that it’s a mystery because there are a few murders in it? Or that it is erotica because the MC has a coupla good boinks? What gaddamn criteria do I have to meet, what are the ninky little rules? It’s a friggin fantasy, all right?
Thank God(dess) no one can claim it is romance.
Working over WordPress is simple, if you know a little CSS. I’ve done it enough times, set up sites with it, so why not use it myself, right?
Yes, foax, that is the first drawing I made on my first very own computer, The Thang. It was spring, hence the tulip. MS Paint doesn’t get called on so much these days. I have enough RAM to run The Gimp whenever I please. But it was fun back then to see what I could do–especially since my system only understood 256 colors.
I spent a whole Saturday evening at this:
Click to see full-size. Lucky you–when I drew it, I couldn’t see the whole thing in my ancient monitor. I’m still pretty happy about how the water sparkles. 256 colors, remember.